One of things I’ve been forced to do with this thing I have is slow down.
A hard ask for someone who has spent all her life on the go, applying herself with gusto to just about anything and everything.
Unbeknowns to me I had literally been living my life on adrenaline – I loved being busy, always been like it, never knew anything different, until now.
Fuck. It. Here goes.
I’ve been sitting, pondering about officially launching this blog for months. A contact of mine said “dude, press go, what have you got to lose?” The truth is very little. I’ve been holding off going public with reams of diary entries I have written over the last 6 months worrying about how this will affect the work I’ve been doing and thinking by some miracle my condition will pass. Maybe it still will. I didn’t want to look like a fraud (you know I might roll over one day and be restored back to the manufacturer’s settings??) but realistically I’ve been fooling myself thinking, at this point, that I can resume a “normal” working life. Whatever that is anymore. Dream on. My work has been suffering anyway. In fact I’m having to completely rethink it.